i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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