I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize