I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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