This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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