Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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