Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
