Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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