I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
40s are totally the cure
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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