I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
