My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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