Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize