Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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