Don't you send me to vm
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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