so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
