i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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