i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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