1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
