dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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