plz talk dirty to me
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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