Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
My pussy is not your playground.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
May the power of my ass compel you!!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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