I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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