The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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