I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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