Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
time to smoke my breakfast
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
