You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Why is your signature on my underwear?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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