She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
