Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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