So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
