I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
