I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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