I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
