Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
