and she was petting her beer can
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
