Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Randomize
