Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
The adults are the big ones right?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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