Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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