Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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