yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
He shit in the fireplace
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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