HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
