I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
