The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
