I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
