brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
