Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
