Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize
