my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
