I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
