It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
