How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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