so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
