He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
