I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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